A silly song for the Christmas Holidays in praise of every fat bastards' friend, elastic pants, composed entirely in twitter.

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Or, the lyrics in full (music coming soon!)



Elastic pants, elastic pants, they make my stomach laugh and dance
Elastic pants, elastic pants, they're the best habiliments
Elastic pants, elastic pants, are ve-ry stylish garments

Elastic pants elastic pants when your stomach grows by installments
Elastic pants, elastic pants, you don't need under-garments
Elastic pants elastic pants one of science's great accomplishments
Elastic pants elastic pants avoid the holiday embarassments

Elastic pants elastic pants, no need to make adjustments
Elastic pants elastic pants, just don't try on your great Aunt's

Elastic pants elastic pants, the clothes for holiday celebrants
Elastic pants elastic pants, the clothes for all contingents

Elastic Pants, Elastic Pants, bifurcated and underrated! (umm, ok, but this breaks the rhyme scheme!)
Elastic pants, elastic pants, give em a chance, give em a chance
Elastic pants, elastic pants, tho' yo' ass be big as elephants
Elastic pants will let you stretch and dance, they even deodorize your flatulence
Elastic pants, elastic pants, the choice of wayward miscreants